Yup giving it all up to God is the only way. Today I woke up feeling so down. It's crazy. I was lost in my head again! why do I keep doing that. it's usually triggered by a survival crisis. like having to pay the rent. that freaks out my wife and then i feel pressured to perform. then I start thinking about how I alone can make this work. then i start forming all kids of plans etc. this is not the way. so I just gave it all up and you know what a miraculous thing happened. first I felt immensely better. how am i going to do the movie? where am i going to get the money? I have no idea1 but i feel good and i realize now as I have realized many times before that this good feeling of peace is really really important. I should never leave it. I don't care what is happening. if the lights are bout to get cut off or if the rent is due. never leave this place.

The miraculous thing is now i feel guided to solutions. like for instance even though I did not plan to make calls logically with a set schedule today. I actually feel like making calls. why because i don't have to. i should never set schedules where I have to do something. that is a guaranteed way to get me to feel pressure and then do it from a fearful place. like "I have to make calls and I have to get donations etc. " this is the wrong way. let it all go and let the spirit guide your actions. how do you know. by how peaceful and joyful it feels. if you can't do it from this place then don't do it at all.

its like to get results I have to get in a place where I don't care about results. then I get the results. to not care means to not be afraid of the outcome. to not care if I fail. the only way to be in that place is to rest fully in god's grace. to really believe that god is there for you. if you depend or look to the world for solutions then you will be inherently fearful. so it is a paradox. to get good results from the world you must give up the world and depend fully on god then you can be guided to the right solutions.

What do you feel like doing?

Do that.